A 19 year-old Florida man was arrested last week while rapping a Lil' Boosie song. What crime did he commit (other than being a Lil' Boosie fan)? A mother says he was spewing profanity that she believes her young children should not have to listen to. He was taken to the county jail and charged with disorderly conduct.

Now, what in the hell (no pun or profanity provocation intended). While I believe the "chil'runs are our future" and probably shouldn't be subjected to hearing cuss words, I don't think it's worth throwing a kid in jail over. I'm sure these kids have soaked up more knowledge of naughty words at school than they have walking down the street. I think this lady needs to get a life for calling the police, but I'm really disappointed that the cops would actually throw a kid in the clink for rapping as he walked down the street. It's not like he was menacing the kids or knocking over a convenience store. He was reciting a song that probably gets played on the radio ten times a day for the whole world to hear.

This news comes on the heel of yet another "anti hip-hop" campaign that has aimed its sights on telling kids how to dress. The "Pull 'Em Up" group says people should not sag their pants and have enlisted the help of several rappers to help their cause. Now I don't know if it's money or sheer stupidity that has driven people like The Ying Yang Twinz (never mind — in their case it's sheer stupidity) to support this kind of buffoonery, but I think it's despicable. Do I think rocking your pants half way around your knees is the hotness? No, but that's beside the point. I also don't like it when people wear tights that show off every fold of their body, but that's not my call to tell them how they can or cannot dress.

At the end of the day, I'm not exactly standing up for either of these groups being targeted by groups that seem to have underlying (or blatant) anti hip-hop sentiments. What I am standing up for, though, are people's rights when they aren't really hurting anyone. I think we've seen hip-hop being made a scapegoat quite enough (who can forget the white Roger Williams board member who says he said the N word because he "heard it in rap music") and now it's time for parents concerned about the language their kids hear to do what they need to do and that's raise them to know better. 

–J from the Bay

In elementary school, I was obsessed with Hole. I relieved my playground angst wailing on my air guitar and fiercely lip-syncing "Olympia." I treated the booklet of the "Celebrity Skin" album like a mini-bible. I even did a report in sixth grade about Courtney Love and why she is the person I most admire (I'm sure teacher loved that one).

Now a wiser, and somewhat more mature university student, I've come to realize that Miss Love ain't what she used to be. Courtney's grammar-challenged blogs of her late husband's life have left me feeling more than a bit disillusioned.  It's high time to shift my focus to a much less published yet similarly enthralling former member of Hole: bassist Melissa Auf der Maur.

Besides her integral involvement in Hole, the Canadian Auf der Maur, toured with the Smashing Pumpkins (another childhood love of mine) during original bassist D'Arcy Wretzky's time away from the group. In fact, it was Billy Corgan who introduced Melissa to Courtney Love after the untimely death of Kristen Pfaff. From 1994 to 1999, Auf der Maur toured extensively with Hole and contributed heavily to the band's third album, "Celebrity Skin." 

After Hole disbanded and her following stint with the Smashing Pumpkins came to an end, Melissa released an album under her name, Auf der Maur.  Now, Melissa Auf der Maur is back and more ambitious than ever with a new multimedia project.

Calling herself MAdM, a decidedly shorter version of her name, the waifish redhead is gearing up to release "Out of Our Minds," which she refers to as the decidedly shorter "OOOM." "OOOM" is fascinating in that it is not only a full album, but a short movie and comic book as well. Each part of the mega-project is featured on a section of OOOM's cryptic webpage.

http://xmadmx.com/ 

The main page greets you with calm guitar music and five white links on a black background. The top link, which reads "ooom" takes you to another page with "OOOM" written in stylized letters. By clicking on the first "O," you can view the trailer for the movie. The tone of the trailer is set by guitar and bass rock with Melissa's clear voice booming over it, enhancing the creepy fairy tale feel of the woods, Vikings, and bleeding trees shown.

Melissa is also seen in the trailer wearing a dark cloak and driving a car. Choice panels from the comic book appear when you click on the second "O," and the third "O" gives a succinct explanation of the whole project. Finally, the "M" features something called the "eyeshow," which serves to confuse even more. As if all this wasn't enough, the short film features a soundtrack separate from the album!

All of this MAdM goodness sounds just about too good to be true, right? Unfortunately, there's a catch: Auf der Maur has no record deal, as her one with Capitol has ended since her 2004 "Auf der Maur" album. Perhaps this obstacle has only fueled Melissa's drive to explore so many different artistic facets through this project; music, film, comics and a comprehensive website. In any case, I can't wait to go out of my mind over what I'm expecting to become Melissa's masterpiece.

-Lara 

When I get assigned a paper or have to study for a test, it's pretty common knowledge among my friends that it's not going to get started any earlier than 11 pm the night before. I'm the king of procrastination (no, seriously — I'd rather organize my socks than do my work) so it's just the way it goes.

One thing that gets me going and gets me through assignments like this are iTunes playlists. If I leave it on shuffle, that's just one more thing for me to mess with ("I'm sick of this song." "This is wack." "How is this even on my computer?!) so playlists are a necessity. For me, some laid-back R&B and hip-hop is usually the route to go to get me calmed down, settled in and ready to write. They're usually a few hours long so that I can put it on shuffle each time I play them and don't get too tired of them quickly. Artists like Common, Mary J., D'Angelo, Musiq and Amy Winehouse make up these joints.

Then there's the party playlist. I'm pretty much a control freak when I'm having a function at my party. If I were a real DJ I would love to spin but the least I can do is make a fat collection of jams to keep the mood up. (If you're wondering, I do do mixtapes, let me know if you need my services).

I guess my point in writing this entry is to see what everyone else makes playlists for. Studying, working out, etc. Let me know what gets you amped for doing schoolwork, for partying, etc. Drop 10 songs from your favorite playlist in the comments and let us know why. Maybe I'll even steal some of yours for my own collection.

– J from the Bay

It's 2008, the start of a new year and new beginnings… and of course, great new music. This year can't be as exciting as 2007 (we’ve already had that revolutionary Radiohead album drop) but there are nonetheless some albums to look forward to. Here are two albums from two very different genres that I am excited for!

1)      The Teenagers, Reality Check (Releasing March through Merok): This Parisian electro-pop group first gained recognition for their remixes: Air’s “Mer du Japon” off the eponymous album released 2007, Simian Mobile Disco’s “It’s the beat” and Soulwax’s “NY Excuse” to name a few. However, they gained notoriety for “Homecoming” which contained the litigious lyrics “I f***ed my American c**t” and about the summer “romance” of a British hipster (with a thick French accent, curiously) and the typical shallow Californian girl. The album will also include other tracks featured on their MySpace: “Starlett Johansson” a more recent single and an obsessive worship song about the actress and “F**k Nicole” another crude, yet nonchalant song about a certain myspace female. This album, although certainly not groundbreaking is sure to titillate some ears. www.myspace.com/theteenagers

2)      Basia Bulat  Oh, My Darling: This Basia Bulat album has already been out since April for those UK and European listeners but will be available for American fans February 5 through Rough Trade Records. Basia Bulat, another talented Canadian songstress, is a little like Feist with the eccentricity of St. Vincent thrown into the mix. She successfully captures the rustic charm of folk/country without its sometime dullness. Her arrangements are delicate and lush, from the soaring and lyrical “Snakes and Ladders” to the hand-clapping and vivacious tune that is “I Was a Daughter.” the soulful and Bulat’s distinctive yet charming voice make each song a personal and stunning treat. Make sure to check out the official video for another track, “In the Night”!
www.basiabulat.com

– Yasaman

Coachella is the stuff that dreams are made of. This festival has witnessed and been the impetus for the return of legendary bands like Iggy and Stooges, Pixies, Daft Punk in 2006 (reported by many to be one of the best live performances ever!), Rage Against the Machine, and the Jesus and Mary Chain. This desert has been a place where all are welcome. A utopia were the indie hipsters, metal heads, regular shmucks and all that lay between, can congregate and enjoy 3 blissful (and blistering) days of music. (Insert Enya here or something similarly new agey/transcendant)

OK so maybe it's not a utopia but it does take place in Indio California and it is usually unbearably hot. I have been waiting for the 2008 announcement for months and frankly, since it came out yesterday, I am very disappointed. Because I was forced to sell my Coachella tickets last year (damn you midterms), I had become obsessed with attending Coachella 2008. Daily, nightly, often during lecture, I would scour various music blogs/sites in search of the latest news/speculation about the 08 lineup. I remember when I heard My Bloody Valentine was reuniting; many of my friends and I were certain, they were coming back for Coachella and I feel asleep that night to the sounds of Loveless. Similarly, the speculation that Radiohead would be riding in on the coattails of their new album and frankly because they ARE Radiohead, made many (myself included) sure that they would be a headliner at Coachella '08.

But my hopes were dashed to pieces Monday night. Who have replaced MBV and Radiohead, you might ask? Jack Johnson. No not the legendary Delta Blues man, the Jack Johnson of Curious George fame. The same Jack Johnson who has put out a slew of bland identical sounding records all of which can found in your nearest Starbucks. *sigh*

Don't get me wrong, the lineup isn't bad. I'm sure some people are happy with it. But as an individual, I'm still feel sort of let down. I'm still debating if I want to go. The return of Brit pop kings, the Verve and fellow Englishmen, Spiritualize will be interesting. The always fantastic Animal Collective and Akron/ Family, and the legendary Roger Waters (the Sunday headliner) are also on the bill which is another huge check plus. Battles and Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings would also be amazing to see. I just don't know if they are $270 not including Ticketmaster (rape) charges, amazing.

- Kristen

I'm just gonna come out and say it: I don't think we're getting Missy Elliott back.

And by that what I mean is, we're probably never going to see another Missy video that makes our jaws drop or hear another beat that sounds unlike anything we've ever heard before — in a good way.

Elliott's as-yet-untitled seventh studio album is in the works and scheduled to drop before summer. The first single is presumed to be "Ching-A-Ling", a track that will also lead the Step Up 2: The Streets soundtrack. And ultimately, it's this fact that is symbolic of this track and Elliott's recent material as a whole. A throwaway soundtrack cut. While "Ching" is considerably better than her last soundtrack contribution — and even the majority of her most recent studio album — it's still nothing that shocks and awes. Sure, you'll shake your ass, but it's not going to be remembered years from now like "The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly)" or even "Gossip Folks".

Missy's never exactly been the female Rakim when it came to lyricism, but nowadays the elementary rap style sticks out even more sore thumb-style. I guess it's because we don't have these wacky beats that we have more time to analyze the lyrics. Which brings us to the next problem: a severe lack of Timbaland. 

It wouldn't be the first time Tim Mosley has abandoned one of his former collaborators in favor of some new shiny toy (ask Ginuwine, who's toiling in legal drama with a record label and has ceased to be relevant without his former mentor). It was hard to imagine him skipping out on Miss, though, with whom he had crafted some of his earliest as well as best material. I guess it's like Missy eerily, though incorrectly, prophesied once in her rhymes: "Me with no Timbaland is like Puff with no Ma$e". Well, we all know how that one ended.

Missy has said she's not done recording for the album and that she hopes to work with Timbaland for the album. But nowadays, Missy is going to have to jump in line behind a plethora of superstars who are still raking in the cash with Timbaland's new electro-style (Nelly Furtado, Nicole Scherzinger, Justin Timberlake, and soon Beyonce, just to name a few). Only time will tell if he can make a little time in his dayplanner for her.

So the question remains: are we ever going to get Missy back? She was once lauded as Hip-Hop's Go-To-Girl, and while she still holds plenty of clout in the music community, she lights up far fewer lights than she used to. We'd all like to hear Tim and Miss back together, but the true test for her will be to see if she could pull off a magnificent album without him. Otherwise, a once unstoppable force may quietly fade to a new generation of noisy beats with forgettable lyrics.

–J from the Bay

Many have asked, so here it is: just one of the myriad of reasons I'm voting for Obama - he's more likely to beat any republican that runs against him.

A great, quick article from the New York Times to get started:

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/12/02/opinion/02rich.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

Here are the numbers from Dec. polls: Obama beats all republicans - Clinton or Edwards cannot.

http://www.zogby.com/news/ReadNews.dbm?ID=1404

This one too, shows Obama wins by a larger percentage

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22327166/

Lastly, this is a great article from the Atlantic

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200712/obama

Why risk it?  Vote Obama so we don't have another republican president.

And pass it on…

-DJ Octoon

 
ps. Disagree?  I'd love to read about your candidate and why I should vote for them.  Click on my name - will send you to my MySpace page - and send me a message.  Seriously…

1. M.I.A. - Kala

Acclaimed by artists, critics, and listener's alike, M.I.A.'s sophmore release is both experimental and accessible by creating a potpourri of sound that kept listener's scratching their heads as to how she made Wreckx-N-Effect sound clever.

2. Busdriver -  RoadKillOvercoat

Busdriver's sporadic delivery and electronic/hip-hop beats propelled him to return to our Top 10 for a second consecutive year after appearing as a guest artist on Islands' "Return to Sea."

Here's a performance of stand-out track "Kill Your Employer  (Recreational Paranoia Is the Sport of Now), never mind the banter.

3. Common - Finding Forever

Being his most commercial and critical album to date, collaborations with Lily Allen and DJ Premier helped Common gain new listeners while still managing to keep his loyal fan base.

Read the rest of this entry »

Laura Katz - General Manager

1. Maritime - Heresy and the Hotel Choir (Flameshovel) - Even though Davey wouldn't get off his cell phone when they were on Automatic Stapler, I still love them and this album, especially the gem "For Science Fiction."

2. Richard Swift - Dressed Up for the Letdown (Secretly Canadian) - First, Richard Swift could not have a better name. Second, Dressed Up for the Letdown is a spectacular collection of first-rate songs. A little bit of Van Dyke Parks, a little bit Ray Davies, even a little bit seventies dub, but a lot excellent.

3. Of Montreal - Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer? (Polyvinyl) - I didn't care about this one at first. 'Thought it was nothing compared to some of their previous albums, but now I like it better than all the rest. Weird.

4. Sondre Lerche and the Faces Down - Phantom Punch (Astralwerks) - I love Sondre! Plus, he's been on the Stapler twice and was very lovely both times. Sondre rocks on this album, leaving behind lush strings for jangly guitars and four on the floor rhythms, even including a fantastic disco-y number that gives the album its title.

5. Josh Ritter - The Historical Conquests of Josh Ritter (Sony Music Group) - Josh was super ambitious on this album and he wasn't completely successful. Nevertheless, the greatness of some songs outweigh the slight failings of others. And I've loved Josh Ritter since 2001; it's a little hard for me not to love everything he creates. 

Felix Danbold - Assistant General Manager

1. The Mae Shi – HLLLYH (5RC / SAF / Entropic Tarot) - Post-son-of-synth-god-spaz-lord, Ezra Buchla, the remaining crew saves the yelps and energy and replace shock with charm. Churning out the years funnest (not a word but applicable) anthems, they can still tear your face off whenever they feel like it. And if they do, you will thank them for it, although that will be difficult without lips. Definitely the band to experience.

2. Why? - The Hollows EP [US release] (Anticon) -  Why?’s untouchable new single alone would make my top 5 list. Throw in a Xiu Xiu cover (YES), a Dntel remix of a new track (tease), and a cover medley by Half-Handed Clouds (cute and clever) and you just can’t lose.

3. BARR - Summary – (5RC) So good. No one can talk quite like Brendan Fowler does. Even if he’s just whispering over a pounding floor tom, BARR is nothing if not novel and arresting. More BARR.

4. LCD Soundsystem - Sound of Silver (DFA) - Awe-inspiringly accomplished and complete. There is little that this album lacks, which doesn’t really say anything, but you should’ve listened to this album by now and realized how awesome it is.

5. Jarvis Cocker - Jarvis (Rough Trade)– Jarvis composed yet raging swagger is difficult not to enjoy, unless you just hate all British people. Without a doubt, best lyrics of the year on “Running the World.” And the instrumentation is so choice. Jarvis is the dude.

Erik Felix – Music Director

1. M.I.A. – Kala (XL/Interscope)- I never thought I’d be this excited about a sampled chicken.

2. Radiohead – In Rainbows (Self-Released) – It’s a perfect release from what you would expect from a band that has nothing left to prove, familiar but still inventive and fresh. Plus, you really can’t go wrong with free.

3. Panda Bear – Person Pitch (Paw Tracks) – Hypnotic and serene. This is the soundtrack to your death.

4. Justice – † (Ed Banger Records) – This album seems to have been discounted because of the nod it received from mainstream media (Thanks Kanye). With all that set aside, the album’s gut-wrenching square synths, bubbling bass lines, hyper high-hat, and dazzling strings is grossly invigorating. They pretty much had me at the orchestral intro.

5. Crystal Castles – Crimewave/Air War 7” (Trouble) – It’s noisy, it’s playful, it’s messy, it’s the sound of an 8-year old regurgitating an Atari console – it’s what you need in your life.

Brandon Raymond – Assistant Music Director

1. Panda Bear - Person Pitch (Paw Tracks) - Noah Lennox's third solo album makes Beach Boys fan irate because of comparisons to Pet Sounds and Animal Collective fans bitter because this is better than Strawberry Jam. He should have kept the 12" version of “Bros”, though.

2. Neil Young - Live at Massey Hall (Reprise) - I hate to say it — I like this album better than Live Rust or Time Fades Away. At some points, Young projects some of his greatest somber moments even better than the studio versions … And for me that's saying a lot. This almost trumps Dylan's live performance with the Rolling Thunder Revue in 1975 as my favorite live album ever.

3. Yellow Swans - At All Ends (Load) - Blissful noise that should be restricted to those using earphones and recreational drugs.

4. Wolves in the Throne Room - Two Hunters (Southern Lord) - Souther Lord snags up a band from Olympia, Washington of all places and they produce a black metal album that makes me want to pull out my copy of Filosofem.

5. Heavy Winged - Feel Inside (Archive) - This is the heaviest psychedelic album I have heard in a while. This is the musical equivalent of having my body being crushed to death. Epic.

Miguel "theuglylover" Abad - Assistant Music Manager

1. UGK - Underground Kingz (Jive) - Seeing as this is the swan song for the duo known as UGK, (following the tragic, untimely death of producer/MC Pimp C) they couldn't have ended their partnership on a better note. The Port Arthur, Texas twosome proved why southern rap is here to stay–to the dismay of backpackers and east coast elitists alike.  With cuts that will make the club bounce and work just as well bumpin' in your headphones, "Underground Kingz" show the world that UGK rule supreme in the south. And as T.I. likes to say, "I'm a UGM alum"….and so are Lil'Wayne, OutKast, Chamillionaire, insert southern rapper here…

2. M.I.A. - Kala  (XL/Interscope) - "Kala "marks M.I.A.'s splash into mainstream stardom. While this may be the case, notoriety has seemed to act as a catalyst, not a hindrance. While not as instantly infectious as its predecessor, "Kala" shows M.I.A. refining her hip, club sound while branching out into dance-pop, trip-hop and semi-industrial soundscapes. She's no longer just a groovemaker. Now she's a songwriter.

3. Liars - Liars (Mute) - Unpredictable and schizophrenic are usually descriptors that could spell death to an album.  Not here. In this case, Liars have created what could be their finest release yet.  Showing off their ability to construct difficult, and challenging post-punk worthy
of This Heat and PIL while at the same time crafting competent pop tunes that would catch the ear of even the most selective listeners.  "Liars" just might be the album that will end the new wave/post-punk revival. Why? There's just no way that this scene will produce another album this good.

4. Burial - Untrue (Hyperdub) - In these last few years, Burial has almost single handedly pushed the fledgeling genre of dubstep out of dingy UK garage clubs and into the consciousness of dance music enthusiasts around the world. With "Untrue", Burial refines the hip syncopations from the debut album and creates a haunting sonic template that is one of the most unique and exciting sounds and genres in all of contemporary music.

5. The Field - From Here We Go To Sublime (Kompakt) - Ed Banger this and Daft Punk that, it seems like the former ambient techno scene had faded into the abyss in favor of bombastic, over-the-top dance music. Utilizing subtlety and minimalism, The Field channels vintage Aphex Twin and Autechre's early ambient excursions and shows that ambient techno is far from dead.  Brian Eno would be proud. 

Amelia Rhodewalt – Assistant Music Director

OK, let me just preface the list with a disclaimer: I have not downloaded "In Rainbows."  You read correctly- I haven't listened to the NEW, FREE, and EASY-TO-DOWNLOAD album by RADIOHEAD.  Each of those qualities alone should have been enough, but I haven't heard it, I will soon when I get around to it, and now let's move on, K?  I already feel bad enough.

1. Grizzly Bear - Friend EP (Warp) - Grizzly Bear are just amazing. They can seriously do no wrong in my book, except maybe including Cansei de Ser Sexy's dumb cover of "Knife" in this otherwise almost-perfect mini album.  I'm all for CSS and Brazil and fun little dance songs, and I even tried to be into this song for awhile, but honestly.

2. Arcade Fire - Neon Bible (Merge) - Again, it's Arcade Fire.  Neon Bible's not as good as Funeral, yes, but it's still much, much better than most other things.

3. Justice - † (Ed Banger Records) - From the opening epic power of "Genesis," to the super summer single "D.A.N.C.E.," it's a non-stop dance party.
4. M.I.A. - Kala (XL/Interscope) - M.I.A. delivers a tasteful grab bag of smart cultural references - from the Clash to disco to Bollywood to the Pixies - but keeps it fun, fresh and danceable.

5. White Stripes - Icky Thump (Warner Brothers) - First of all, this album had the coolest promotion ever.  Free ice cream in pretty boxes at Coachella, transforming Tower Records into Icky Thump Records with only one album for sale, and even fancy USB drives with special tracks. Also, the music is pretty good.

Read the rest of this entry »

Dear Bloggers, Readers, Eaters, etc.

In case you were wondering, next year the blog will get'a'going again.  I can feel it - blogging is in the New Year's air.

Oh, and if you see one movie over this Winter break, check out Tim Burton's Sweeney Todd.  Actually only check out Sweeney Todd if - like me - your holidays are all about revenge, slitting throats, and copious amounts of blood.  Not to mention meat pies.  Yes, that kind of meat.

Have a bloody good New Year.

-DJ Octoon 

P.S. If you're a DJ or intern at UCLAradio.com and want to contribute to the blog, just hit me up through my show's MySpace. That's right, click my name! 

From Gore Vidal's Perpetual War for Perpetual Peace: How We Got To Be So Hated (paragraph breaks my own).

"Although we regularly stigmatize other societies as rogue states, we ourselves have become the largest rogue state of all. We honor no treaties. We spurn international courts. We strike unilaterally wherever we choose. We give orders to the United Nations but do not pay our dues.

We complain of terrorism, yet our empire is now the greatest terrorist of all. We bomb, invade, subvert other states. Although We the People of the United States are the sole source of legitimate authority in this land, we are no longer represented in Congress Assembled. Our Congress has been hijacked by corporate America and its enforcer, the imperial military machine. We the unrepresented People of the United States are as much victims of this militarized government as the Panamanians, Iraqis, or Somalians.

We have allowed our institutions to be taken over in the name of a globalized American empire that is totally alien in concept to anything our founders had in mind. I suspect that it is far too late in the day for us to restore the republic that we lost a half-century ago."

I would add, we need to read more.  And by "we," I mean, "me."  Right now.  See you later.

-DJ Octoon

Ferraby Lionheart stopped by Automatic Stapler this past Wednesday (Wed 4-6pm!) and was super terrific. Check out his most recent music video:

Keep an eye out on our podcast to hear his live set very soon!

As you all may already know, the police leaked on OiNK today. Yes, everyone's favorite music torrent site was taken down, ironically enough, by pigs - who were probably just butthurt because they didn't get any invites.

Well, the big bad wolf may have taken down the first little piggy's home, but don't you worry, we'll build another, far superior torrent site out of sticks! If he blows down that one too, then we'll just built the greatest torrent site ever! Out of bricks! And well, if he blows that one down, then well, we're pretty screwed :(. 

Let us all have a moment of silence for our recently departed friend. May he be at peace somewhere up in that bacon palace in the sky.

October 23, 2007, forever known as Pink Tuesday. Never forget.

Yeah, another post about Flight of the Conchords, possibly the best thing about living in 2007.   Check out Bret You Got It Going On on youtube.  Lyrics below!

Jermaine: Would it be gay to write you a song, to cheer you up?

Bret: No.

Jermaine sits on his bed, picks up his guitar and notepad.

Jermaine: It's called, Bret You Got It Going On

"Bret you Got it Going On"

Hey there Bret, I see you lookin' down
Don't want to see my little buddy there with a frown
Just because I get more women than you
Well that's just because they don't know you like I do

Sure you're weedy, and kinda shy
But some girlie out there must be needy for a weedy shy guy
They want you as the needle when they're rolling in the hay
Just hear me out when I say

Bret you got it going on-hon…
The ladies will get to know your sexuality
When they get to know your personality
I said, Bret you got it going on-hon…
Not in a gay way
Just in a 'hey man, I wanted to say
that you're lookin' ok man'

Why can't a heterosexual guy
Tell a heterosexual guy
That he thinks his booty's fly
Not all the time, obviously
Just when he's got a problem with his self esteem

Don't let anybody tell you that your not humpable
Because you're bumpable
Well I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable
If I say you got a boom - ow ow
C'mon Bret, help me out now

Bret you got it going on (Bret Sings: 'You got it going on')
That's the conclusion, that I've come to
But that doesn't mean that I want to bum you
Bret you got it going on (Bret, reluctantly: You got it going on)
No doubt about it, we'd be gettin' crazy
If one of us was lucky enough
To be born a lady

Oh!
If one of us was a lady
And I was your man
If I was your man
Well sometimes
It gets lonely
And I nee-heed a woman
And I imagine you with some bosoms

In fact, one time, when we were touring
And I was really lonely
And we were sharing that twin room in the hotel
I put a wig on you
When you were sleeping, I put a wig on you

You-ooooh, oooh
And I just laid there and spooned you
ooh, Bret you got it going on

End of Song

Jemaine: So, hopefully that made you feel better
Bret: Can I please have a look at the lyrics

Jermaine hands him the pad - Bret snatches it.

Bret: This is another one of your weird songs, man.
Jermaine: In what way?
Bret: That bit, 'sometimes I put a wig on you when we're on tour.'
Jermaine: Put a wig on you?  No.  Didn't say anything like that.
Bret: That's definitly a bit gay.
Jermane: What is?
Bret: Putting a wig on me while I'm asleep.
Jermaine: I think, sometimes you hear what you want to hear.

Bret nods.

Jermaine: It wouldn't be gay to put a wig on a man and pretend they're a woman.  How can that be gay if you're pretending they're a woman?

pause

Jermaine: Not that I did that.

—

— 

-DJ Octoon

Cement-confessed adoration for UCLAradio.com! Next to the Fresh Corn Grill, a very delicious establishment on Westwood Blvd.

- Laura